Recap from last season on the Heather show, I ran away from home in January. I literally did not know what else to do. I could not imagine having a new place without my husband. I could not handle the stress of the financial burden of the rental market, no real proof of income and no 3 months rent in savings. I was victim to Gentrification so that added to the solidification of my decision as well I packed up all of the stuff and vacated Hermosa just as he and I planned for the RV Project. I left all my “stuff” behind in safe hands as that includes our daughter (20) and our puppy dog (7), whom I miss. My son and his family had already left the state to start their adventures as a family. I really was all alone, for the first time in well a lifetime. I couldn’t stay put and go thru the grieving, something compelled me to travel and look for his energy. I was set on my path and after 3 months in Thailand here I am in Bali. I knew very little about Bali but have had so many friends and family that have been, I figured it for a good destination.
Knowing virtually nothing about Bali, I chose several spots to visit. Ubud, Sanur, Seminyak, Canggu and Amed. Along the journey I realized that this destination was about Love as you will see. Upon landing I got that anxious, in a new country, energy, you travelers know what I’m talking about. I booked a hostel close to the airport that a friend raved about so at least I knew the hostel would be decent and it was.
Kelebang Moding, Ubud. I had booked this AirBnB at least a month before, knowing nothing about the country and island I am visiting. I figured staying in a small village outside of any big tourist city for 2 weeks with a local family sounded ideal. Turned out to be the best thing I could have done. upon my arrival to Unis place, I was immediately dressed in local Balinese attire and whisked away to one of the largest Hindu Prayer events at the 2 big temples, the one at Mt Batur and the other called the Mother Temple Besakih, the largest temple in Indonesia. It was magical to be among the locals doing and learning what they do at prayer and being so openly welcomed by not just my host Wayan and her family but by all that saw me there. Some commented that I must be married to a Balinese man to be dressed correctly and some inquired about where I am from and we shared stories about our cultures. this while we are all smashed together, so smashed together that I felt my punk rock background really saved me from panicking in the packed situation that crowd movement makes you so squished together and anyone with claustrophobia would certainly react. It took a couple of hours to get thru the line of thousands of people waiting to get in for prayer services and it ran round the clock, 1 group of thousands to the next. I learned the process correctly from “Mama” Mind you this is my 2nd day in this new country, what a great experience. within the next 2 weeks I attended a local villagers wedding and learned all about it and experienced the wedding with all my senses to absorb the colors and beauty of everyone, the smells of the incense, the taste of the food the sounds of the families. The acceptance of letting strangers come join them in this ceremony, the way the villagers all spent long hours and days to create this ceremony and then the ones who worked don’t even go, the other persons goes, you basically send 1 representative from the household. Then the following week I climbed a volcano, Mt Batur, at 2am to see the sunrise. The hike was beyond my physical ability and it was a struggle to get to the Sunrise spot. I never thought of giving up, Instead of looking up the mountain to see how steep it gets and how gnarly it is and how far away it still is to the top,I focused on the next step right in front of me, I stayed present and I focused on each step and talking to my heart and body thru this so that it didn’t give out on me, determination and a little self competition. This showed me that to accomplish climbing a mountain, just focus on the present and take 1 step at a time.
Wayan 
Marco 
Sunrise 
Mt Batur 
Marco
Ubud is a beautiful area covered in palm trees, banana trees and rice terraces, water running thru the hills make for a fantastic concert to the most vibrant backdrop. I found the town itself too hustle and bustle too much touristic feature and incredibly packed. But just outside of the main city of Ubud I found nice areas along organic farms and rice terraces, a few minutes walk from me was this place to meditate, I did a couple of the sound healing meditation sessions and something the one practitioner said struck me hard , she said, “The love for myself is the love that I am seeking.” and she said the mantra “I am the love that I am”. Both of those lit a fire in me. Holy shit. Like it hit me, I need to fall in love with myself, I am missing all the love that my husband threw at me every day. I’ve been so sad over this missing love that I no longer receive and I doubt I will get anytime soon. Here I was just given a solution and a glorious one. The realization that I AM, the love that I am seeking, I am filled with love and I need to love someone now that he is gone. I think we all have this desire to be loved and to love so deeply that you connect on a different level with someone. Well now that I was aware of the purpose of the journey here I can focus on it.
It was my time to leave the village and move to a few stops with a travel partner and old friend. We went to Sanur, which was nice quite beach with hardly anyone and watched the sunrise. Stayed in a families house converted to homestay/hotel. We learned some politics with the host family as it was their national day to vote. This family seemed to be capitalizing off the trend in growth of tourism and how people book. Everywhere in Bali I saw construction, building and expanding to accommodate people. It is a bittersweet thing to see, as I don’t want to see this culture diminish and get watered down. This was a nice visit with my friend who flew all the way from the US to visit me on my journey for 2 weeks. Love of friends, I have friends that will fly across the planet to see me wow! like that is some pure love right there. Sanur was beach and shopping and I had lots of work to do. So not much play time.
Canggu was up next, known for its surf and yoga and I would say that is 100% accurate. I booked us at the Serenity Eco Lodge right near the beach. Online it sounded fantastic. In reality, it was amazing, another family who converted their home into an eco resort to capitalize on the growing tourism. This was a comfortable place for me as it was a permaculture garden and vegan restaurant. I did a few yoga classes as I realize, Self Love means mind body and spirit, If my mind is in a good status knowing I am the love that I am seeking, and that I need to love myself, that means loving myself enough to change. I work many hours in a sedentary position 40+ hours a week, with work and Prep School it is a lot of unhealthy sitting. I found this form of yoga, Yin and specifically Yin Restorative, and I realize I need to be doing yoga even if its the positions that help counter all the sitting I do, I know as I get in to practice I will get better. While at the place I could also feed my body well with the Alkaline Restaurant whose chief operator is the Mom. This family is not only doing a yoga resort but they are also practice eco friendly lifestyles. Self Love, I know I love the gardening part of me that I was doing prior to departing, and I know I need to do Yoga I am in another perfect spot and it was a good eye opener for me. Not only at the first hand education on how they handle black water, grey water, build with bamboo, and growing and composting was so close to my heart. I was given a tour by request Oh I ended up staying here over a week as I came back after my travel partner left. The owner also took me to the Holy Temple to do a bathing ceremony in Holy Water. I was given the instructions and details of what to do at each step. I was in the most beautiful and serene place as this out door temple is surrounded with water. I stepped in to this crystal clear cold water and followed the instructions. I meditated on some intentions, felt extreme gratitude to again be in a place very few westerners are doing as the local and learning it. I understand that Hindus believe in God and I believe in the Universe of energy I am still able to learn and execute these rituals as my heart is in a state of bliss and serenity in the most green beautiful places on earth and feeling so very grateful for the present. It was sad to depart.
Amed is my last stop, I decided the last week here I was going to do some activities splurge a little on myself. and I heard about this far away place being a good spot for snorkeling and diving. Self Love, we need to spoil ourselves a little. To live my life denying myself of experiences is not truly loving myself. I decided on a place that had some good reviews on the dive shop and dive master and location. Being a solo traveler that was my worry about having a dive partner. I was placed into the right place, immediately discussed and set the plan for diving and we ended up being just 2 of us and taking the camera each time made for some memorable moment captured on camera. This has been the most beautiful diving I have dove in my 30 years certified. SCUBA can be intense for some people, You are breathing under water and you have to remember to relax and slow your breath, isn’t that a good life lesson. Slow down and relax. You have to rely on yourself and not panic. Another good life lesson, to be self reliant and chill. So many lessons have been learned all focused on Loving myself. Bali is definitely a place for love.
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Monkey 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Before the Dive 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra 
Photo by:Nengah Putra
My focus has now been set and my discipline must be as well. To be aware of the solution and to choose not to adapt and re align yourself to the new path is self defeating. To love yourself enough to change is what Bali taught me.
Hi, this is a great blog and i always look forward to the information you post here. Thanks again
Hi, such a great blog, thank you for sharing and i cant wait to read some more. Thanks again